Sleep

 

It's the number one topic between parents... "So how many times did they wake last night? And are you feeding to sleep each time? Do they go straight back to sleep?" 

When we brought Saoirse back from the hospital she wouldn't sleep without being held...she wouldn't sleep on her back at all. And for those first few months, Finian and I were like ships in the night, taking turns holding her while the other slept, ate, went to the shop or on the rare occasion took a shower. Then around 8 weeks, Saoirse started crying every night for hours on end. She'd wake four to five times a night and with each wake, it'd take about an hour or two of holding her in our arms, walking her back and fourth until she fell asleep. You might get her asleep right away, only to have her wake up immediately after placing her in her cot. There was so much anxiety going into the night. It broke my heart to hear her cry. We used to take turns holding her trying to comfort her. At one point, Finian's arm went numb from holding her so much. (Apparently it's a common thing according to Google!) When we went to the doctor, he said she wasn't crying long enough to diagnose it as colic and that she'd eventually grow out of it. Even typing this out right now just boils my blood. I can't believe I sat there and let him tell me that. But the exhaustion was REAL... so so real. I was incredibly jealous of anyone who's baby slept more than two hours at a time. Even now, I can't stand people saying things like "I miss those newborn sleeps." What newborn sleeps? We never had those! Anyways, that was our first five months of parenthood. 

The day Saoirse turned five months, we started sleep training. Two weeks before, I downloaded Taking Cara Babies ABCs of sleep, we watched all the videos, read her pdf, did a phone consultation, read up on sleep training... I can't tell you how many moms were like "you're going to let your baby cry?" Man, the judgement was REAL and still is. But about two to three weeks later, Saoirse was on a schedule sleeping 12 hours a night and napping 3 hours during the day. Finian and I went on our first date night since she was born. What a change. Having been breast feeding too, I got my body back in the evenings and could enjoy a glass of wine. Our relationship was better as we had time to hangout with each other and the brain power to talk through parenting decisions. Most importantly, I could enjoy being a new mom. Sleep training isn't for everyone, it's not even a guarantee that it'll work on your baby. We found an article where a mother of twins talked about how it worked on one but not the other and by four years old they were both sleeping through the night no problem. All I can speak for is our experience and it worked for us. I wear my Sleep Training Badge with pride. And if we are lucky enough to have another kid, I'll be going back to that programme.

List of things that helped us with sleep:

• Taking Cara Babies sleep programmes 
  We were gift this by my mom and to this day it's the best gift we ever got...besides chocolates! If you've a friend or loved one expecting it's a great gift. Worth every penny.
  
  
• Sound Machine
  Marpac is the brand we use. There's so many out there but you just want one that doesn't have a timer. The idea being that when the sound stops, the absence of sound will wake the baby. Here's a good list of sound machines.
  
  
• Dark Room 
  like SUPER SUPER DARK. (Even the tape over the fire alarm light. But just the light!)
  
  
• A Good Swaddle
  
  
• The Huckleberry App
  This app is great if you're not quite ready to purchase a sleep programme but want a little bit of help with sleep. It predicts your child's sleep.